### Hackers ###
We fetch your mail, we route your packets, we guard you while you surf.
Don't fuck with us.
"Sir, I have provided you with an explanation. I am not obliged to provide
you with an understanding." -Samuel Johnson
"Computergames don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as
kids, we'd all run around in darkened rooms eating pills and listening to
repetitive music..."
In theory there is no difference between theory and practice,
but in practice there is. - Jan L.A. van de Snepscheut
The Universe is utterly indifferent to the fact that
you do not realize the consequences of your actions,
you will have to deal with them just the same.
Linux: gawk, date, finger, wait, unzip, touch, nice,
suck, strip, mount, fsck, umount, make clean, sleep.
(Who needs porn when you have /usr/bin?)
- stolen from usenet
It's Nature's job is to provide clever answers to dumb questions.
It's Humanity's job to phrase the dumb questions properly.
-The Book of Reminders
Creativity is no substitute for knowing what you're doing.
J.P. Clark’s Law: “Any sufficiently advanced cluelessness/incompetence is
indistinguishable from malice.”
Warning, attachments may be attached.
All contents (c) unless dangerous.
A: Because it messes up the order in which people normally read text.
Q: Why is top-posting such a bad thing?
A: Top-posting.
Q: What is the most annoying thing on usenet?
It sometimes makes sense to avoid redesigning, reimplementing and redebugging
the wheel.
geek(n.)
A person who has chosen concentration rather than conformity; one who pursues
skill (especially technical skill) and imagination, not mainstream social
acceptance. ... Most geeks are adept with computers and treat hacker as a term
of respect, but not all are hackers themselves - and some who are in fact
hackers normally call themselves geeks anyway, because they (quite properly)
regard `hacker' as a label that should be bestowed by others rather than self-
assumed. ...
On slashdot.org:
Q: "As a novice linux user I ask what is the difference between Vi
And EMACS."
A: "vi is like masturbation. It's not as good as the alternative,
but it's always there."
Information is power, but so is electricity.
If Linux were a beer, it would be shipped in open barrels so that anybody could
piss in it before delivery.
But we'll get revenge on them all, once people realize that WAP is just gopher
all over again!
It compiles! Ship it!
"UNIX *is* user-friendly; it's just picky about its friends."
Behold the Glory of Wireless: Surfing from the john was never so easy.
- shorten transmission times -
- save bandwidth worldwide -
- do not use uppercase letters -
the single best invention since the advent of electricity ever ever ever has got
to be the off switch.
the internet is so far to one end of the probability curve that it's coming back
around for a second pass before it even arrived in the first place.
I sense much NT in you,
NT leads to bluescreen,
bluescreen leads to downtime,
downtime leads to suffering.
NT is the path to the darkside,
Powerful Microsoft is.
"We live in a society where, if you comb long enough and hard enough with
sophisticated enough search tools, you can find just about everything," Mr.
Gostin said. "That doesn't mean it's all right for people to assemble it, make
it easy and sell it."
Having tamed the lightning, we are now teaching sand to think.
### Politics ###
What the sociopath and sadist do for fun, the "moralist" does on behalf of "duty" or "justice."
- Robert Anton Wilson
Puritanism: the haunting fear that somebody, somewhere, might be having a good time.
- H.L. Mencken
Dear god, please protect me from those who believe in you.
Americans love democracy so much...they really should try it some time.
Those who will not reason, are bigots, those who cannot, are fools, and those
who dare not, are slaves.
-George Gordon Noel Byron (1788-1824), [Lord Byron]
Orwell was an optimist.
To confuse, inveigle, and obfuscate.
Many people are starting to believe the idea that there are leaders and then
there are followers. They feel it is someone elses responsibilty to do things.
Little or no personal assumption of responsibility for the populous at large.
"During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary
act." - George Orwell
You spooned us saturday mornig mouthfuls of maggots and lies disguised in your
sugary breakfast cereals.
The plates you made us clean were filled with your fears.
These things have hardened in our soft pink bellies.
We are what you have made us. We have grown up watching your telivision.
We are a symptom of your Christian America, the biggest SATAN of all.
This is your world in which we grow.
And we will grow to hate you.
- Marilyn Manson
...I have no recollection of that senator.
"This is not a conventional war. We have to forget propriety."
- Colonel Robert A. Koob, tentative head of jury in the
Sergeant Charles E. Hutto case. Hutto was accused of
assault in the My Lai massacre during the Vietnam War
"The infiltration group was composed of 1/3 males, 1/3 females,
and 1/3 party officials."
- from a military intelligence document during the
Vietnam War, quoted by former army intelligence officer
Bruce E. Jones
It is considered appropriate to sustain conditions which are against the best
interests of almost everyone.
Democracy is three wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for lunch.
If people are basically good, you don't NEED a government;
if they are basically evil, you don't DARE have one!
In God we trust.
All others are suspects.
### Drugs ###
Here's to a long life, and a merry one;
a quick death, and an easy one;
a pretty girl, and an honest one;
a cold beer - and another one!
--- Irish toast
Abstainer: A weak person who yields to the temptation of
denying himself a pleasure.
--- Ambrose Bierce
Put it back in the horse!
--- H. Allen Smith, an American humorist in the '30s-'50s, after he drank his first American beer at a bar.
The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out
who is drunk and who is just stupid.
--- Richard Braunstein
Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself,
undisturbed by the facts.
--- Finley Peter Dunne
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk.
That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
-Ernest Hemingway
Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society.
If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people
for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.
- P.J. O'Rourke
There are bold mushroom hunters and there are old mushroom hunters, but there
are no old bold mushroom hunters.
There is a saying in German: "Alle pilze sind eflbar! Manche sorten kann man
allerdings nur einmal im leben essen."
This translates roughly as "All mushrooms are edible. But some kinds can only be
eaten once."
If u want to fix it with drugs u need something serious.
Something thats bigger than u are.. and that will only kill u anyway so its not
much of a cure.
Confucius say: Stop quoting me!
Bill Hicks: Here is my final point.
About drugs, about alcohol, about pornography and smoking and everything else.
What business is it of yours what I do, read, buy, see, say, think, who I fuck,
what I take into my body - as long as I do not harm another human being on this
planet?
No left turn unstoned.
A mystic is a paranoid turned inside-out who knows that the universe is a
conspiracy on his behalf.
Clarence Thomas, U.S. Supreme Court Justice "I was smart enough to use pot
without getting caught, and now I'm on the Supreme Court. If you were stupid
enough to get caught, that's your problem. Your appeal is denied. This 40 year
sentence just might teach you a lesson."
Al Gore, U.S. vice-president "My work on the environment is so important that I
can't take the time off to go to jail for something so trivial as marijuana. But
its okay with me if you go."
Newt Ginrich, Speaker of the Senate "See, when I smoked pot it was illegal, but
not immoral. Now, it is illegal AND immoral. The law didn't change, only the
morality. That's why you get to go to jail and I don't. Any questions?"
"Well, I did smoke pot, but I didn't inhale. And I was in England, so it really
doesn't count. Plus, no-one saw me. So what's the big fuss? The half million
people arrested for pot last year are just sore losers."
William Clinton, U.S. president
Who needs drugs with a mind like mine.
"Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by
those who could not hear the music." - Angela Monet
Reality is for people who can't handle drugs!
### Jokes ###
Knight jumps queen... Bishop jumps queen...pawns jump queen...GANGBANG!! - King Louis XVI
Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
A bullet may have your name on it but splash damage is addressed "To whom it may concern."
When in trouble,
When in doubt,
Run in circles,
Scream and shout!
"I don't think of myself as short, I prefer to think of myself as
in easy weapons range of your groin."
"He's dead, Jim. You grab his wallet, I'll grab his tricorder."
"His brain began to buzz gently and suck its thumb.
Lots of little synapses deep inside his cerebral
cortex all joined hands and started dancing around
and singing nursery rhymes." - Douglas Adams
"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable.
Let us grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if
we may not eff it after all." - Douglas Adams
"Stay here. Don't move. Don't touch anything. I've made
a note of the position of every particle of air in this room,
so I shall know if you've been breathing" - Douglas Adams
If we were meant to go around naked, we would have been born that way.
"Oh bother," said Pooh as he gazed upon
the unspeakable visage of Chulhu.
"You look like the south end of a nortbound horse"
Hindsight is 20/20.
Circular Definition: see Definition, circular
"I'll stuff this oar down your throat and paddle your ass from the inside!"
'Professional bollock juggler.
Please do not try this at home.'
DISCLAIMER: Do what you want with me, but leave my employers alone!
"Hatred is the cowards revenge for being intimidated."
-- G.B.Shaw
The fecal matter had certainly struck the rotary atmospheric motivator.
An opportunity missed means more exercise trying to run it down.
Brian (not wanting to be a messiah): "You are all individuals..."
Crowd (in unison): "We are all individuals..."
Monty Python's "Life Of Brian"
what do you want to be when you grow up? breathing.
'Oh Bother!' said Pooh, as he was frozen in carbonite
Be good, be bad, be a hypocrite like me!
>u don't drink, don't smoke,
>what do u do?
masturbate a lot.
g-f : who used to be a punk, never was a goth and still likes heavy metal
EDDIE LIVES!
What crawled up your ass and died?
Phone by Microsoft...
Verizon Technician provided by the Bulgarian Secret Police.
-- Who do you want to call today?
"Develop your eccentricity while you're young. That way, when you are old,
people don't think you're going gaga." -- D. Ogilving
You may have the right of way, but the other person may not be awake.
For mathematicians pie are square, but for the rest of us it's
circular and delicious
"A duel?"
"Nothing that formal. A simultaneous decision to murder one another is more like
it."
One crow - sorrow,
Two crows - joy,
Three crows - a letter,
Four crows - a boy,
Five crows - silver,
Six crows - gold,
Seven crows - a secret
That has never been told.
You know what they call a gathering of crows? A murder. A murder of crows. Think
about that.
Why is anal sex such a pain in the arse?
"Oh Bother!" said the Borg, "We've assimilated Pooh!"
The easiest way to pull yourself up is to drag someone down.
Your reality is a figment of my imagination.
This mail was sent using 100% recycled electrons.
You can't cross a chasm with two small jumps.
I am just replacing your ignorance with my own.
I have a shotgun, a shovel and 30 acres behind the barn.
Do not trifle with me.
You look at life differently while suspended upside down and gagged.
This Sig will self-destruct in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1....
If you think my post is senseless, try reading it backwards.
CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR AWESOME!
this is not a link
Murphy's Generalized Law: Anything that can possibly happen, will eventually
happen.
You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike...
Just my $.02. Keep the change.
"88.2% of statistics are made up on the spot." - Vic Reeves
I support anonymous posting. This and all other posts are hereby in the public
domain.
This is not a sig.
(yes, we have no .sig today)
.signature: No such file or directory
"Take my advice, I'm not using it!"
Temporal Reverse Engineering Inc: If you need us we will call you last week.
(place random stupidity here)
Brackets contain world's first nanosig, highly magnified:[.]
Did you just fart? Or do you always smell like that?
If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let'em go, because, man,
they're gone.
"To be suspended from the legal profession is the moral equivalent of being
ostracized by child molesters."
"Life's hard. Reinforced concrete is harder"
"I dont think stupid people shold breed"
- Marilyn Manson
"The Truth is: There is no Truth, nor Joy, nor Beauty except the truth you
choose to speak, the joy you choose to create, or the beauty you choose to see."
-The Book of Reminders
"Ah, good taste, what a dreadful thing! Taste is the enemy of creativity." -
Pablo Picasso
Subtle as a fart in church.
if this world didn't make u sick, u wouldn't really be alive.
the assassin-whore [who's motto is "f*ck with me and you're dead"]
To know a thing's name is to possess it.
Viermele care te macina pina te distruge este tentatia de a fi de acord cu cei
care te critica, pentru a le obtine aprobarea.
"I am who I am." - God
We may have years, we may have hours; but sooner or later we all push up
flowers.
We are born wet, naked and hungry.
Then things get worse.
<SIGQUOTE>
X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
Another file downloaded from: NIRVANAnet(tm)
& the Temple of the Screaming Electron Jeff Hunter 510-935-5845
Rat Head Ratsnatcher 510-524-3649
Burn This Flag Zardoz 408-363-9766
realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 415-567-7043
Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 415-583-4102
Specializing in conversations, obscure information, high explosives,
arcane knowledge, political extremism, diversive sexuality,
insane speculation, and wild rumours. ALL-TEXT BBS SYSTEMS.
Full access for first-time callers. We don't want to know who you are,
where you live, or what your phone number is. We are not Big Brother.
"Raw Data for Raw Nerves"
X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
</SIGQUOTE>
From www.Eneri.com :
The most painful distance in the world,
is not between the living and the dead,
but it is when you can't see that I love you,
even though I stand right in front of you.
The most painful distance in the world,
is not when you can't see that I love you
it is when two hearts love but cannot be as one.
The most painful distance in the world,
is not when two hearts love but cannot be as one
but when indifference must be feined, to a distance,
which in truth, binds the two souls together.
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\ \_/ /
\ , /
| Gabor Laszlo
/__ \ __\ gabor@psychonautical.org
\ / / www.psychonautical.net/h_d_case
\ ICQ 22359333
---
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